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The World That I Long For

22 November 2023   11:56 Diperbarui: 22 November 2023   12:10 246
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Kompasiana adalah platform blog. Konten ini menjadi tanggung jawab bloger dan tidak mewakili pandangan redaksi Kompas.

I nodded my head which meant that I was allowing him into my life. At the same time, my defenses came crashing down and soaked my cheeks rapidly. How could I not? All this time I had been trying to survive to heal with him and after a long journey I now found someone who was ready to help me face another big wave.

Thousands of days I spent with the man who kept me by his side. Ataya proved her words and managed to bring me into a new life that was so calm. In the end I realized, what we can learn in life is how to accept a situation without blaming reality. The long journey finally brought me to the day when I understood that life is more peaceful when we are able to understand an Ikhlas well. Although there may be many wounds and there must be tears that break first so that there is no more tightness that disturbs.

And among the many things I've discovered, there's one thing that I still don't fully understand, about someone who gives a hug not just for joy, but a sense of calm. Ever since I found Ataya, I've hated talking about separation and loss. Since loving Ataya, I've fallen in love with the way the universe makes room for love in secret ways. And since being with Ataya, I know I no longer fall for her way of thinking, but also her heart.

And when I'm hurting, all I need is a piece of heart that is sensitive without being asked, a pair of ears that are always ready to listen, a set of hands that are always ready to embrace when I fall. Because nobody's perfect, but my support system completes me.

Finally, for the man who is with me now. I leave my desire in these words. Because there is hope that wants a miracle. I hope God will make us jatukrama with harsa without lara. May this script and struggle get abimantrana from the owner of the universe.

- THE END -

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