Commitment-Building Marriage: Be Careful If You Don't Want to Regret It

Illustration of Wedding Day (Source: adira.co.id)

One of the important things before living a married life is to prepare mentally. Get married not just because you want to but get married indeed because you are ready to settle down. Because in marriage we will undergo a transition period that has quite a lot of changes. 

When we are married we will encounter attitudes that our previous partner may not show. It becomes a consequence of being able to accept the shortcomings and advantages of a partner. Not only mentally, but the marriage must also prepare financially carefully between the two. It is very important from the beginning to think about stable Finances and financial management in marriage considering the needs that are certainly more and more when married. Stable Finances can also be an indicator of the family's economic well-being.

In addition to considering financial conditions and mental health in marriage, we need to consider marriage readiness factors, namely the factors of social relationship skills, role readiness, spiritual readiness, and communication skills. Social relationship skills in a marriage are very influential in building a relationship with a partner, by having a good relationship, it will be easy for couples to work together. In addition, after living in a new environment, couples can build relationships with neighbors. In this case, one must have a personality that can control emotions, be able to compromise and have a high tolerance attitude to form intimacy in building relationship skills.

Role readiness is the ability that a married couple must have to make wise decisions. For example, important decisions in determining the goals be achieved in fostering a household include readiness to become parents, readiness to carry out obligations as head of the family, readiness to carry out the role of the housewife, and determining children's education.

Spiritual readiness is also important to be prepared for a man. In this case, a man is a leader as well as a family priest. A man also needs to have social readiness to organize the family to work together to achieve family goals.

Communication skills are very influential in marriage readiness. Non-verbal communication errors are caused by cultural differences. These cultural differences are also related to the emergence of context conflicts in the context of interpersonal relationships in couples of different ethnicities. In this case, each partner must have a good personality for responding to perceptions and language differences and a good mindset so that good communication will be established in marriage readiness.

Based on the evaluation data above, we can conclude that marriage readiness or rushing to build a marriage commitment cannot be said to be feasible. Marriage readiness still does not fulfill several factors, namely financial factors, psychological health, role readiness, social relationship skills, spiritual readiness, and good communication skills. The emergence of divorce cases is caused by factors of disharmony in the household. 

The community's response to marriage readiness tends to marry according to what is felt at that time and marriage is considered valid when done as long as both parties are willing and fulfilled physically and mentally because marriage is a good action and must be hastened so as not to cause free adultery.