Fourth, a person with negative self-concept tends to feel not being liked by others. He feels that he is ignored. Therefore he reacts and considers others as his enemies that such kind of perception would not be able to create the warmth and intimacy of a friendship. He will never blame himself, but will consider himself as a victim of the awful social system.
Fifth, he is pessimistic to competition. He is unwilling to compete with others in the achievement. He considers he will not be powerful against the competition that damages him.
In contrary, a person with positive self-concept is also indicated with five items: (1) he is confident about his competence to solve the problems; (2) he feels being equal to others; (3) he accepts praises without any shyness; (4) he realizes that everyone has different feelings, behaviors and desires that public do not entirely agree with the same; and (5) he is able to improve himself because he is able to express the aspects of personality that he does not like about and he tries to change it.
In the reality there is no one that is purely has positive or negative self-concept. However, as far we can, we should have the most possible traits of positive self-concept.
So, when is the appropriate moment to look at our mirror? Yes, now, right now. Period. No need to wait 1 January, 1 Suro (name of a month in Javanese calendar), Islamic New Year, Ramadhan, Sinchia (Chinese New Year) or Saka New Year (Hindu’s New Year). There is no other best time except NOW.
Well, dear friends, actually it is also an advice for me, myself. I, who often struggle so hard to conquer my troops of weaknesses as a human being. Fortunately, one of Johari Windows – a psychology theory about five personality windows of human being – regarding my serious mistakes is not open yet because I think God still protects me that such a shame will not be widely disclosed. Thus, through this article, I at least attempt to share to others. Because, I recalled the message of Imam Syafi’i (a prominent figure in Islamic jurisprudence) that a knowledge sometimes would be more powerful and beneficially effective in the hands of the recipients rather than in the hands of the disclosers or messengers.
Thus, have you looked at your mirror today?
