The World which Begin with the Word "Me"

For the sky.

For the earth.

For life.

And for all astonished things that happened above them.

The world which begins with the word “Me”

Me

I am an ordinary child, grow in an ordinary place, and come from an ordinary family.

Since the first time I cried, until later that I transformed into no one. Nothing change so big – to become someone like what happened to Peter Parker, Adolf Hitler, Michael Owen, and other kids who has made this world so wonderful with their coming.

I am still being that child whom you can see in a mess and haven’t finished my study yet. My hair seems curly because I am rarely combing my hair. My eyes are round and brown like marbles made from clay.

I force myself not to wear glasses to help my sight because I don’t want to be more old-fashioned from Harry Potter. I have an ordinary body, really not athletic. 

Actually I do hate breakfast. Breakfast makes my brain stop. My energy comes from glasses of caffeine from coffee.

That’s my appearance when people see me in 30 seconds.

More than that, people intend to see me as a suck, selfish, and too much kidding. My brain is heavier in the right side, I guess. Maybe that’s the reason why in these years of college, I just get nothing but confused and sick.

I really hate something routine and forced. I hate every system in this world, fanatic to religion, politic, well-ordered language, and polite rules. Or, such a thing like that. I prefer a simple thing and a mess without pattern; if we shake hot water, sugar, and coffee without measure it, at the end it will turn into a really nice coffee. 

Even though that’s me, I'm still refused to be put in a list of rebellions. I'm not a kind of people who like to gather with some jerk, hang out and say something rude on the street, mock to the government, or anarchy. They just people who are in a bad condition, that accidentally stupid.

I’m trying my best to get away from something certain. Science is one of the things. I’m really appreciate someone who can love and live in this kinda thing. But for me, something certain in this world is this moment, this time, this second. More than that, is just a prediction. Many people think that I’m a kind of introvert for some parts of my life. But actually it’s all wrong. I just won't this world to see me as a freaky girl. Well, just believe me that, you will never understand how to be called as “a mars alien who wears sandals”.

My hobbies are brushing my teeth and reading. Two different feelings that I have from both activities are loving of loneliness and hatred. After finishing my routine taking a bath and starting brushing my teeth, then I‘m thinking how clean I am. But soon, when I’m standing in front of the mirror, I see the other side of me trapped there. Struggling to get out and join with this free side. At last, I end it up by spitting the mirror.

I always like to mix anything. This truth can be seen from the diversity things in my room. Books, camera, guitar, laptop, charger of a friend’s of friend, coffee glass which fell, dirty clothes, and hundred of paper roll. All make a really life sense.

There is many things that I can’t understand and I don’t wanna understand in this life. One of them is why people keep asking whether "much” is right and “a little” is wrong. 

God is only one and He is the truth. Sinners are billion, do they want to be called as an innocent too? You are confused, aren’t you? Neither do I.

One of few things that I believe beside the God is exist, is that the truth is not exist. There is only mistake. 

The truth is one of the people fantasy who are scared of hell. What is right in this world? Whatever the truth, there must be a small space which can lead people to say that it is wrong. Nevertheless, a mistake is still a mistake. No matter how sweet it is.

I’m breathing everyday and walking everyday with such a thing. I’m not insane. Well, maybe a small part in my brain gives me a different thinking from other people. But who doesn't?

It’s a little hard to be a human, isn’t it?