Balance On Living

Since long ago, mankind has always been looking for every way to be in balance on living. Thus had kept my mind wandering over and over again for months -not to mention lack of sleep. 

But a week ago, my eldest mentor sent me a breathtaking picture which told the realest attitude of mind we shall bear in living. And it truly cleared myself from confusion. Because the message is very obvious: "Don't heave ourselves with insignificant desires, let alone condone the evil be good and the wrong be right." That is the practice to fully acquire the balance on living.

Welcoming Even-Minded Understanding

To lead ourselves into balance on living, the first (and foremost) test is to openly welcome even-minded understanding. Even-minded understanding does truly prevail when you have already perceived enough experience, culture, knowledge and also behavior from various yet diverse people. 

It would actually happen only if we were content with ourselves and notably our circumstances as well. So we need highly take any lesson from everybody, and any moment we have been witnessing too. If not, how else?

Well... Here are several ways to enable ourselves to be content. Firstly, do not presume our surroundings as if they were against us. As it is said that people are not against us; they are for themselves. 

Honestly, I have rarely been content with my family -especially own parents- ever since I made my decision to keep helping others through charity, also volunteerism world. But during this social distancing period, I do lately find myself in surprise that I am able to endure, not to weep over any discouragement from my parents like what I used to be. 

And lo! A sweet yet meaningful moment with my mother occurred a fortnight ago. After having breakfast together, she said sorry for spilling her disappointment, sadness and frustration too often towards me. It totally opened my heart not to object things from the truth and mistake lie there.

Another thing is to cease questioning ourselves about life's mystery for the sake of clarity. Because not every day can be bright. And we would only have ourselves wandered to nowhere, in which we may never find the answer properly. Be gentle to accept it.

 For instance, I did often ask how on earth could mostly people tend to greedily, eagerly and conceitedly obstruct others and even bind them for the worse with such prejudice -and namely stigma. And I still hate admitting those all until today. 

Unawares, my criticism of worldly measure had inanely grown and even nearly turned out into extremism. Thankfully, few closest ones have been patiently and strictly reminding me that no object can take our control from us.

Also, near ourselves to GOD universally. We are to persevere with challenge to conquer fear and have faith in balance like yin and yang, until our heart is content. 

The aim is to instill in man fear of sin and faith of God (Sathya Sai Baba, 1986). An exemplary came from a religious yet joyful circle named "Keluarga Harmoni" which I have joined just for months through a friend's invitation. 

Before, I had a thought it would be another vain search of ongoing friendship. My fear is that highly I might have been given little care to sharing any burden I have been through; alas rarely is every circle aware of such need.

But by being together with "Keluarga Harmoni", I do start realizing partly that healthy relationship would only go on if and if only one did listen, understand and act courteously. 

There, do we hardly ever break any relationship unintentionally. A little understanding I have gained with the help of the Divine. "Learn, Unlearn and Relearn" process is an inevitable cycle which has to be through in our lifetime in order to gainfully and successfully welcome even-minded understanding wherever the circumstance is. Rather, balance does literally flow on our living.

Quit Seeking Perfection

Next is to quit seeking for perfection. Totally! This is mostly the hardest test everyone has to overcome as ego is basically connected to human's instinctive desire. But we must not be daunted by it. We dare gently strive for such adversity with long-lasting courage. Surely, we will obtain the balance on living. Mindfully, lovingly, and honourably.

Putting our ego aside is a leading measure to let go of our desire for having perfection. As for my instance, the greatest ego I have ever had is to simply prove anyone else that today's concept of success is not merely about earnings, riches, establishment, harmonious family, and so every worldly measure lies on; but persistence of making meaningful living for universe through act, creation and work too. Not to mention the more the insult emerged, the eagerer I wanted to rush the proof occur at all. And the result turned out to be uglier.

Almost I broke the essence of diversity's concept: understanding one another. Even did I spoil myself to the extent of being judgmental yet not listening as well. 

Further, I often bothered the closest ones I have (family and few close friends) by arguing / objecting / opposing their reasoning again. And here came the worst. I nearly burnt the bridge, threw away all the lovely and meaningful relationship the team in Sedekah Buku Indonesia community has been building together due to personal disagreement. 

My leader emphasized that one's writing should not represent his/her interest over the community's importance. I felt like being restricted, but she didn't care and remained with her mind after all. 

So I went beyond the border. I shouldn't have ever done it. And I had regretted all those mistakes I have made. Because all that does matter enormously is the spirit of helping one another and supporting somebody to present the better of him/herself.

Besides, I already have a more complicated concept in mind for so very long. It is the longing to have all kind of privilege: fortune, acceptance, well-being of family, influence, true love, and so forth. The standpoint is that people in general barely put any regard to the hardship one having been through to have it. 

So does the irony itself prove the ones who often get the publicity are those that use the privilege they have in mistaken or improper way. And what about everybody else with commitment, determination, honesty and loyalty? Only little share might apparently be given. Sadly, many do not have any understanding of these all.

There, I brought myself into a lonesome journey -mainly during the 3rd year of entering volunteer's world. And later on, more and more I found myself into despair along with loneliness. Not only did the frustration emerge, but the demanding stigma of work which is basely connected to employment from both my family and my mother's extended family kept opposing me severely. 

"Is there a way to fulfill all the privilege without committing immoral act? Will I obtain it in a noble way?" These are the questions that always coming to my mind.

Sometimes, I wanted to give up and come for a handy shortcut. But the journey must go on. I would rather endure it all in elegance than linger myself being the plaything of circumstances. Because the finest avail of living is to live the fullest of our life by being more loving, more caring, kinder and happier than we are today. 

On each day, fully and successfully. Were we not aware of it, we would have eventually forfeited the respect and regard of the ones we love -and the community as well. And it is not our right to determine the privileged and unprivileged ones. As only GOD, the only power in the universe, has such right. Thus is the epitome of balance on living.

Brand-New Happiness

The outcome of balance on living is the brand-new happiness. And it can't be any truer. Brand-new happiness literally means that even when life is rugged, we dare bravely cope with it very well in forbearance, fortitude, and humility as well. Not willing to hurt every person unintentionally is the clearest hallmark of brand-new happiness. Another evident one is the act of completely eschewing "taking for granted" attitude.

Nothing can guarantee our happiness. But nothing can outdo a man with full of peace, love and kindness. And whenever I take a sight on every creation I have made (writing, website, and namely the currently ongoing work of making medical device, "Low Cost Mini Patient Health Monitor"), I can't help myself, but being keener to be kinder and happier than I am today. Then shall we live our life to the fullest?

Here is a way to put much gain of strength beautifully and peacefully: "Begin the day well, and GOD will take care of the rest." Yes! Better set our best foot forward and let our life be our prayer. Thus is the importance of balance on living. So, it is high time we neared ourselves to the balance on living. Happy Ramadhan ALL.

Juan Karnadi

WITH LOVE AND PEACE