Reports from the Central Statistics Agency (BPS) show that, in the last three years, the number of marriages in Indonesia has decreased. The most drastic decline occurred in 2023, with a drop of around 2 million couples, from 1,705,348 marriages in 2022 to 1,577,255 marriages in 2023. Moreover, the Central Statistics Agency (BPS) also stated that in 2023, the divorce rate in Indonesia decreased by 10.2%, from 516,344 cases to 463,654 cases. Although there has been a decline, this number is still considered quite large. Interestingly, 76% of these divorce cases are contested, meaning the divorce was initiated by the wife. This can be concluded that many women in Indonesia feel dissatisfied or uncomfortable with their marriages and choose to end them. What are the factors behind this trend? What is the response of psychological experts to this phenomenon?
Marriage, once seen as the ultimate symbol of happiness and love, is now viewed by some as frightening, especially among the younger generation. This perception is influenced by the viral "Marriage is Scary" trend on social media, which gained attention as many influencers faced issues like domestic violence, infidelity, and family conflicts. These realities have caused growing fear and anxiety about marriage, leading many young people to reconsider or avoid it altogether, fueled by increased awareness of such marital challenges.
This phenomenon ties into the growing discourse around the "Marriage is Scary" trend, which highlights fear and anxiety toward marriage. Psychologist Ghozali Rusyid Affandi, S.Psi., M.A., from Universitas Muhammadiyah Sidoarjo (Umsida), explains that while fear of marriage is natural, it becomes problematic when it disrupts someone's mindset and leads to avoidance of marriage altogether. From a psychological perspective, Ghozali outlines several factors contributing to this fear.
1. Fear of Marriage Failure
Negative family experiences or witnessing divorce can instill deep anxiety about long-term relationships. These negative experiences shape their perception of marriage, leading them to feel that marital life will inevitably end in failure. This anxiety can weaken one's self-confidence in long-term relationships and even affect how they build commitment with their partner.
2. Uncertainty About the Future
Social media amplifies fears by showcasing marital conflicts, infidelity, and instability. This can trigger the perception that marriage does not always bring happiness and stability. Instead of viewing marriage as a step toward a better life, many people begin to see it as something that could end in greater suffering and problems. This uncertainty is further exacerbated by the social influences that link marriage to tension and unhappiness.
3. Fear of Losing Freedom
Concerns about sacrificing personal time, mobility, or career opportunities weigh heavily on individuals. They worry that marriage and family will limit their mobility, making the fear of losing freedom a significant factor influencing their decision to marry.
