Things I've Done Until I'm At This Point

Hi, let me introduce myself, my name is Ahmad Zidane Albarik, I'm commonly addressed as Dane. I'm going to tell you about the things I've done until I am at this point.

When I was in high school, I had a big ambition to finish my studies, and to get my beautiful grade so that I would be able to continue my studies at my dream university.

There were ups and downs when I was in high school; I failed to get my best score, so that I got ranked 19 in my classroom, that was my stupidity because I didn't take it too seriously, but where was the point I realized that, "I should be the better version of myself, I should study harder, I should work on myself, I should give my best in my next grade." that didn't make me give up, I had a huge confidence in myself that made me want to try, try, and try again. 

I started to push myself to study harder. I started to change the way I talk to myself by giving myself some good affirmations. I thought like; "I'm not that person who has failed in his grade anymore. That's the past, that doesn't define me today." those things would balance my mind and my heart. and, yap... from the initial ranking of 19, now it has increased to 8, and up to 5. Until I'm at the point, I got the top 3 positions in my class for three consecutive times in three semesters.

That's where the story begins. Before graduating from high school, I received the announcement that my name was on the list of eligible students. At that time, I was very happy because I thought it would easily help me to get into my dream university. But everything was beyond my expectations. I was rejected through the SNBP pathway. However, that didn't discourage me from trying and trying again.

At that moment, I felt like I was at the lowest point in my life. All my hopes seemed to be shattered, but I dealt with my sadness by allowing myself to feel it. I didn't dwell on it and decided to study even harder to apply to the SNBT pathway and took the test, but failed again. I have also applied for MANDIRI, SPAN-PTKIN, and even for Scholarships, but was rejected.

And now, here I am, having overcome all those challenges, and I am now at Universitas Negeri Padang. Although it is not my dream university, I am trying to learn to love what I have and come to terms with what I have been through.