Have you ever felt disappointed? Disappointment is an inevitable part of life. Disappointment arises when deeply held positive assumptions are challenged or discredited. As humans, we've all experienced it, whether it's a failed job interview, a breakup, or a lost opportunity. It can leave us feeling sad, frustrated, and even angry. It might be tempting to handle disappointment by avoiding it altogether. One way to do this is to not have expectations in the first place. But this isn't realistically possible. Most people view disappointment as a negative because it is associated with feelings of despair, confusion, and loss, after the realization of some form of self-deceptive idealization (Maher, Igou, & Tilburg, 2020). However, disappointment seems to drive efforts to repair or restore broken frames of meaning. This also differentiates successful people as they have the ability to turn disappointment into something meaningful. Therefore, there are several things to help people turn disappointment into happiness or positivity.
Disappointment is a state of shattered assumptions, but internal self-regulatory resources allow individuals to retain meaning by reflecting on the past with nostalgia. The palliative power of nostalgia demonstrates its psychological benefits. People often rely on other sources of meaning, such as gratitude, religiosity, or self-compassion, to reaffirm meaning after disappointment. These sources can reduce the impact of potential threats and can provide a sense of significance and purpose. Nostalgia can help people in need of existential recovery. Although nostalgia mixes positive and negative effects, overall nostalgia has more in common with positive pleasant emotions, as nostalgia can reduce the impact of disappointment on the perception of meaning (Maher, Igou, & Tilburg, 2020). Like the risk of traveler disappointment, memorable travel experiences are important to destinations, but there is little research on how the memorability of a travel experience affects travelers' intention to revisit over time (Yaon Hu, 2021). Memories of previous travel experiences increase revisit intentions by evoking nostalgia. With nostalgia, their disappointment can be restored into a different experience and add fond memories when there is a repeat trip due to nostalgic nostalgia. This provides valuable insights for destination practitioners in terms of designing and implementing effective strategies to manage travelers' prior expectations and drive revisit intentions.
In addition, disappointment can be masked when one receives a gift. A study examining the emotional expression and regulation of disappointment in Chinese, Japanese, and American preschoolers revealed that children can mask their disappointment with positive displays (Miller, 2020). The excitement and surprise of receiving something new can temporarily distract from feelings of disappointment. At that moment, the focus shifts to the gift itself and the joy it brings, rather than the unmet expectations. Therefore, while disappointment may still linger, the act of receiving a gift can provide a temporary reprieve and sense of gratitude. Another strategy to be able to change disappointment is to change feelings of stress that make a bad lifestyle into a healthy lifestyle, such as eating healthy food and getting enough sleep (Psychology Today, 2016). We can also use our strengths to avoid the effects of excessive disappointment. Also, avoid the temptation to withdraw from loved ones and instead be alone which is frustrating. Last but not least, be your own voice of reason. As hokey as this may sound, research shows that when you engage in positive self-talk using your own name (i.e. instead of saying to yourself, "I will get through this," say "Nazla, you will get through this.") you reduce anxiety and feel more in control (Psychology Today, 2016).
From all above, we can summarize that we can choose to be happy even when we are faced with disappointment whether it's a failed job interview, a breakup, or a lost opportunity by letting go of negativity and adopting a more optimistic mindset. Even though it might not be simple, we can use perseverance and an optimistic outlook to turn setbacks into chances for joy and development. Disappointments can serve as learning experiences and use them to grow and improve ourselves.
References    Â
Ip, K. I., Miller, A. L., Karasawa, M., Hirabayashi, H., Kazama, M., g, L. W., . . . Tardif, T. (2020). Emotion expression and regulation in three cultures: Chinese, Japanese, and American preschoolers' reactions to disappointment. ELSEVIER, Vol. 201, 1-19. doi: 10.1016/j.jecp.2020.104972
Hu, Y., & Xu, S. (2021). Memorability of a previous travel experience and revisit intention: The three-way interaction of nostalgia, perceived disappointment risk and extent of change. ELSEVIER, Vol. 20, 1-10. doi: 10.1016/j.jdmm.2021.100604
Weigel, D. J., & Shrout, M. R. (2020). Relationship conflict, appraisals, and disillusionment: The moderating role of depression. ELSEVIER, Vol. 171, 1-6. doi: 10.1016/j.paid.2020.110494
Maher, P. J., Igou, E. R., & Tilburg, W. A. (2020). Nostalgia Relieves the Disillusioned Mind. ELSEVIER, Vol. 92, 1-9. doi: 10.1016/j.jesp.2020.104061
 M.D., S. B. (2016). 7 Ways To Deal With Disappointment. Retrieved from Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/positive-prescription/201603/7-ways-deal-disappointment
