Divorce and parental separation become a very influential factor for the formation of behavior and personality of children. Harmonious family atmosphere that is not often led to conflict between both parents. One of the things that become big fear for a child is the parents' divorce. Divorce is not just an impact to both parties are bound in a marriage but also will have an impact on children who have been born in such ties. When divorce occurs, children will be the main victims. Parental divorce is considered one of the main causes of failure of a child's future. Children can lose orientation of the future because
loss of parental affection. Divorce events may cause adverse effects for the child's personality, such as emotional instability, experienced anxiety, depression, and
anger. However, the results showed that not all child victims of divorce adversely affected. Divorce was also a positive impact on children.
First, the child victims of divorce have a good orientation for their future. The child will think that the parents’ failure is able to become the lesson so that he is not like his parents who choose the divorced way, and it will be their BEKAL for MENUJU the better future. The child feels that inspite of their parents have been divorced, but he should not be discouraged or worse life. This is indicated by good academic and non academic achievements in school. Thus, not all children are victims of divorce disoriented future. This depends on the perception of children about divorce of their parents.
Second, the traumatic experience can make children become resilient, the personality
mature or otherwise. As many as 75% of child victims of divorce can rise up and achievers. According to Bonnie Benard, a child who has special characteristics that resilient social competence, problem-solving skills, autonomy and also the desire of the purpose and future. Children become strong and courageous in accepting, this is related to personality hardiness. Children are able to control his emotions will form action change a stressful event into something useful for himself. Children with good self-adjustment post divorce parents would find positive meaning from her parents divorce in order to create a more brilliant future.
The latter, of obedience to God and parents. Parents who come from religious families are often forced to marry too young and it turns out they were married to the wrong person. It makes kids think that it is an empowering experience.
Divorce of parents to bring a good impact for children. It relies to his parents, environment, and community. Children have a good perception of divorce, because a child gets the attention, protection and love that enough of her parents. Community also helped to give advice so that makes the individual who is always optimistic view failure as something that can be improved and modified. Conversely, individuals who are pessimistic to accept failure as his own fault, consider it comes from nature that have been ingrained and can not be changed. optimistic individuals will feel more confident, comfortable, expressive, more positive look at the social world, to feel other people can be trusted and do not feel fear will be left behind by others. The better a person's perception of divorce, the better the person's optimism for the future.
