Humans are social creatures. They live by each other's necks. They are surrounded by many unique individuals. Because humans are difficult to satisfy, we have a natural sense of not being enough. We will always seek something better, bigger, or even something that will make us feel superior to others. We don’t want to be judged or show our vulnerable side.
Emotion is what makes humans human. It is safe to say that we can’t live without emotion. In modern society, humans tend to compare themselves to people around them as a way to express their emotions. We start thinking, "Why is everyone better than us?" Why they appear to be in a more stable state of life, why they appear to be much happier, why they appear to have many achievements, and why they appear to make us look bad in some ways. Those questions have been circling in our minds without realization.
There are many reasons why we think others are better than us. For instance, inferior. Inferior means someone is not as good as someone or something else. We feel like we don’t belong anywhere. When we're feeling inferior, it's usually a result of comparing ourselves to other people and feeling like we’re not enough.
In 1954, psychologist Leon Festinger developed Social Comparison Theory, which is the idea that individuals determine their own social and personal worth based on how they compare to others. We can compare in two ways, upward and downward. When we make upward comparisons, this can lead to not feeling good enough or inadequate. On the other side, when we make downward comparisons, we may feel more successful or accomplished. What we are really grappling with is self-acceptance and the idea that "we are enough."
The thought of not being as good as others commonly happens to teenagers. As we see on a daily basis, many high schoolers struggle with feeling like they are not enough. They have to live with other people's expectations. They are adapting to the adult mind. This is dangerous because it makes them think about all of their mistakes and failures, as well as how many times they’ve failed at something important in their lives, like school or work. They struggle with overthinking things, which makes it really difficult for them to do anything in life because they’re dwelling on one thing instead of moving on to another task.
The feeling of not being good enough can result in what is known as "impostor syndrome." With this, people begin to doubt their accomplishments and convince themselves that they are frauds who will be exposed at any time. To make matters worse, we may begin to believe that everyone around us is far better at what they do. Our inner critic can be so loud that it can paralyze us completely. When this happens, we may begin to accept it as a true representation of reality, leading us to abandon our true passions. You can probably recall a time when your "not good enough" thoughts prevented you from doing something.
A simple question like "Why is everyone better than us?" has physical and mental impacts on us. We will be more determined and work harder to achieve our own expectations. It actually affects our lifestyle. It has the potential to alter our daily routine. When we act under pressure, burdens accumulate and become extremely overwhelming, leading to a variety of mental issues such as stress and anxiety. When you have mental problems, you may also experience a range of physical symptoms like stomach pain, lack of focus, headaches, insomnia, and muscle tension.
The feeling of not being as good as others is like two sides of a coin; it can’t be separated and works simultaneously. It's beneficial in that it helps us improve our self-esteem, but it also harms our lives by pushing us too hard. There are many ways to prevent us from thinking too much about why we can’t be as great as everybody else.
First, spend more quality time with ourselves. It is necessary to turn off the noisy world from time to time, get a break, and try something we have never tried before. We spend too much time on social media pretending to be the main character by posting our version of the best life. We put ourselves under pressure to share our joys while keeping our difficulties and challenges to ourselves. We tend to check how many likes and followers we get. We are thirsty for validation. It's for the best that we put an end to this way of life. Me-time is a necessity for any working individual. It's the time we take to recharge our batteries, clear our heads, and refresh our approach to life. It's the time we allow ourselves to let go of all that's going on in our lives and just be us. You can also use this time to exercise or read a book; any activity that helps you de-stress will help reduce anxiety and stress.
Second, the beauty of letting go. Letting go is a delicate concept to grasp. Letting go doesn't mean giving up on your dreams or on yourself. Letting go means accepting that some things are better off being left behind than clinging onto them as if they will magically come back at any moment. When we let go of someone or something that has hurt us or held us back in some way, we learn how to move forward without holding onto those negative feelings or emotions. Letting go allows us to find new opportunities for happiness and growth. The beauty of letting go teaches us how we want things done instead of telling us how they should be done. If we try hard enough, we can usually find some way around the obstacles in front of us so that everything works out eventually, or at least then we've learned something new along the way.
Third, remember that every living creature is unique and beautiful in its own way. We have different gifts, experiences, choices, and journeys. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. If someone criticizes us or makes us feel bad about ourselves because they don't think we're good enough, remind yourself that they don't know who you truly are. You have so much more depth than anyone could imagine. We all need to improve ourselves, focus on what really matters, and believe in ourselves. When we focus on a goal, we are more likely to achieve it. This is because when we focus on one thing, it becomes less overwhelming, and our brain can focus on a single task rather than many tasks at once. The last thing you want to do is accept adversity. This means not being too attached to certain things or people because they may not be around forever and also understanding that some things are out of our control.