Looking back on my pains is surprisingly easier as I am no longer physically there so it is quite easy to laugh it off ( although sometimes bitterly) and I can sometimes feel a bit amazed and amusingly embarrassed how trivial it would look now considering how unbearable and earth moving it felt at the time.
Looking back at the good times I had, however, was more difficult and sometimes even emotionally constipating.
There is always this eerily emotional tingle that keeps on nagging me. This annoying feeling that makes me stupidly wish I could go back in time and experience the good and the fun time again. Well, I can’t. Nobody can. No invention of time machine yet. And even if you could, it wouldn’t feel the same way. Try to re-enact the fun you had with your friends in college 10 or 15 years ago. Invite them all for a reunion. They may still look the same ( except for some receding hair and protruding belly), and their first names will probably still be the same ( unless there were some sexual change involved during the period of absence) but it is not going to be same as it was 10 or 15 years ago. They would act differently, think differently and the saddest thing is, be completely different persons from what you think they were 10 or 15 years ago. Life goes on, people move on. I should too.
